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I'll take death over that any day."I turned to look around at the people sitting with me. "I need you to promise me something. All of you." When I had their attention, I continued. "When we are in the Deep Roads ... if I am," I gulped, "taken, you must promise to kill me. Find me, and kill me. Don't let me turn into one of those monstrosities."The pitying looks everyone gave me were galling, but it had to be said. I coerced a promise out of the five men, though Aedan and Alistair both choked up. Finally I let out a short scream and I was finished. I turned around and looked into the teachers eyes. I knew what was coming. She would take me into the office and call my parents. I had been caught masturbating at school before, so I was familar with the drill. Instead of the office she took me into the locker room and made me sit on the bench, and she sat next to me. She told me that I could talk to her about anything that I needed too. She also said that maybe we could work. Still, I had to get an idea of what part of the city would be best suited for the office. That way, I could set up shop faster when the time came. Today, I was looking at the kinds of offices located in different parts of the city. I looked at the facilities available for businesses. I was also using the time to walk with Felicita. We could spend time together this way, more together than if she was chauffeuring me around in her scooter. Instead of looking at the back of her head, I could walk. A year ago at age seventeen my urges and need to be a girl in public were so great that it drove me to come out my room and closet.When I got my driver’s license I was able to go into the city and explore. Soon I found the courage to dress in full feminine drag usually making myself up in my car and becoming my alternative self “Cari.” At night I began to daringly visit a night club in Boston that was transgender friendly. Being slim, short, petite and with purposefully long light hair, I had.
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